What My Grandmother Taught Me About Finding Pain
My grandmother's name was Vui. In our family she was the closest thing we had to a doctor. When someone's back went out, they did not go to a clinic first. They went to her kitchen or on her bed and got her massage or her acupuncture needles.
She practiced manual therapy, acupuncture and massage, and she had been doing it long enough that people trusted her hands more than they trusted a waiting room.
There were a lot of grandchildren. I was the only one who learned it.
My grandmother was the family doctor
What she was doing that I did not understand
She was slow. That is what I remember most clearly, and at the time I assumed it was just how older people worked.
She would put her hands on someone and then not do anything for a while. No pressing, no rubbing, no technique. Her palm resting somewhere, moving an inch, resting again. Some days she spent longer finding every spot than she spent working on them.
Then she would press one place, the person on the table would make a sound, and she would say something in Vietnamese that meant roughly there it is, and get to work.
I thought she was being careful. She was not being careful. She was looking, feeling, seeing everything and the patterns throughout the body.
Why I was the only one who learned it
I have thought about that for years and why she said I was the only one that took after her sight, her rhythm, her hands. I think it was that I stayed in the room.
Twenty years of practice on one person
My mother worked two jobs for more than twenty years, mostly standing ones. The kind where you come home, sit down, and the sitting down hurts more than the standing did.
So I worked on her as a kid does to help their mom, seeing her struggling broke me. Not professionally, and with no training beyond what I had absorbed watching. Just most evenings, for years.
What repetition teaches that technique does not
You stop guessing. You learn what her right shoulder feels like when it is fine, which means you notice the moment it is not. You learn that the pain she reports in one place is being caused somewhere else, because you have had your hands on both places a thousand times.
Could you describe your own shoulder to a stranger accurately enough for them to find the problem inside an hour? I could not describe mine, not until I learned the anatomy. That is not a failure of communication. Bodies are not good at reporting where things actually start. You get this vague sense of dullness that builds slowly over time. Then a sharp pain happens either over night or suddenly when you are doing an exercise. Then you seek help, anyone who can help you get relief.
The anatomy came second
I studied biology, destined to become the stereotypical doctor but headed towards a doctorate in physical therapy. But something changed, I wanted to be hands on.
To use my hands, to be there, to be present with the pain.
I spent the first part of my professional career in a chiropractic setting, working mostly with people who had been in car accidents and other injuries.
What that setting taught me
Tech neck. Back injuries. Sciatica, frozen shoulder, scoliosis pain management, tennis elbow. Real names for real patterns. I learned the anatomy sitting underneath everything my grandmother had taught me to feel, which meant I could finally explain what my hands were already doing.
That crossover is ordinary in this field. In the American Massage Therapy Association's 2026 profession research, 60 percent of massage therapists report referrals from chiropractic offices and 64 percent from other healthcare professionals. The two worlds sit closer together than most people assume and I believe that they go hand in hand.
Honestly, I do not think either half is enough alone. Anatomy without feel means you know where things are supposed to be. Feel without anatomy means you can find something without understanding what you found.
What people actually walk in for
I lead with finding rather than relaxing because most people are booking for pain relief and have not found it with other providers.
In the same AMTA research, 49 percent of people who get a massage do so for soreness, stiffness or spasm, and 42 percent for chronic pain relief and management. Relaxation and stress reduction accounts for 43 percent. Those overlap, and plenty of people want both. Still, most of the room came in because something hurts.
What the research says, including where it is thin
I want to be accurate here rather than flattering.
The National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health points to a 2016 evaluation by the Agency for Healthcare Research and Quality that reviewed 20 studies and found massage helpful for chronic low back pain. They are careful to add that the strength of that evidence was low. I would rather you hear that from me than find it on your own.
For neck and shoulder pain, a 2013 review of 757 people found massage more helpful than doing nothing and no more helpful than other active treatments. A 2016 review of 519 people found it could give short term relief of neck pain if the sessions were long enough and frequent enough.
That second condition is the interesting one. It is close to how I already build a session.
For headaches the evidence is thinner than either I would like. A 2016 study of 64 people and a 2015 study of 56 people both recorded fewer headaches over the course of the study, and in both cases the comparison group improved about as much, which is why NCCIH describes the results across headache studies as not consistent. A 2011 study of 83 people found no effect at all from hand massage.
That is the whole picture and I would rather hand it to you than pick from it.
A 2024 systematic review in JAMA Network Open, led by Selene Mak, mapped 17 systematic reviews across 13 conditions. Its conclusion was direct.
“More high-quality randomized clinical trials are needed to provide a stronger evidence base to assess the effect of massage therapy on pain.”
So the honest position is this. The research supports massage as useful for several kinds of pain, and it does not support anyone promising you a result. I would rather show you the research than write something that reads better.
However, when it comes to lived experience. Our clients and reviews tell the full story. We will let you formulate your own opinion.
What this means when you are on my table
The first stretch of your session may not look like much is happening. I spend real time finding things before I work on them. If you have been somewhere that started the hour immediately and moved through your whole body on a schedule, this will feel different.
Why I might not work where it hurts
If your neck is what brought you in, and your neck is being pulled on by something in your upper back, the upper back is where most of the hour might go. I will tell you that is what I am doing and why. I would rather you leave understanding your own body a little better than just feeling good for an afternoon.
It also means I will tell you when I do not think I am the answer. There are things I can address and things where I can only work the symptom. Saying so costs me a booking and it is still the right call.
Every session runs the same flat rate, 100 dollars for sixty minutes, 150 for ninety and 200 for two hours, whether you book Relax and Soothe, Pressure and Relief, The Hands or Migraine Relief. There is more about how I got here on the about page, and Manny's background is on the team page.
Frequently asked questions
Do I need to know which massage to book?
No. Tell me what hurts and how long it has been going on, and I will tell you which session fits. If you are torn between two, book the sixty minute version of either and we can adjust in the room. There are more answers on the FAQ page.
Will you work on the spot that hurts?
Always. Often the spot that hurts is where you feel the problem rather than where it starts. I will explain what I am finding and where I am going before I go there.
Is deep pressure better than light pressure?
No. Pressure that makes you brace works against itself, because a guarded muscle does not release. The right pressure is the deepest one your body accepts without tightening up. My job is to find that right balance.
How is this different from a chain massage?
A chain gives most people a similar full body session with a few extra minutes on whatever hurts. I do close to the opposite. If one area needs the whole hour, it gets the whole hour.
Does massage actually work for chronic pain?
The evidence is real and it is uneven. Reviews find benefit across several pain conditions and also find that the quality of the underlying studies needs to improve. Anyone telling you it is settled is overselling it. My experience on the table however, tells a different story.
How do I book a session?
Everything runs through the online schedule. If you would rather ask something first, the contact page reaches me directly. For the fastest response, call or text 813-797-0406.
